Who's the grubbiest pirate on the high seas? Why, it's Captain Beastlie, me hearties! He is EXTREMELY dirty and pretty smelly too, and that is just the way he likes it. But as he eagerly counts down the days to his birthday, little does he know that his smart and shiny crew have a huge - and very soapy surprise - lined up for the big day. "One grey and grimsome Monday, Captain Beastlie rolled out of his bunk. Three rotten cabbages and a bacon sandwich rolled out with him. "Only five days left till my birthday!" he roared, picking a bogey out of his nose and licking it. "Mmmn! Slimey!"