'When one is in town one amuses oneself. When one is in the country one amuses other people' - Oscar Wilde. 'There are three easy ways of losing money - racing is the quickest, women the most pleasant, and farming the most certain' - Lord Amherst. 'Country manners dictate that even if somebody phones you up to tell you your house is on fire, first they ask you how you are' - Alice Munro. Everyone likes the country, said Lillian Hellman. If you own a waxed jacket and a pair of wellies, are feeling sheepish, know all about fowl play and udder matters, then dear me, these quips and quotes on rural pursuits will be a breath of fresh air. There again, as Kenny Everett pointed out, country life isn't so much tiptoeing through the tulips as slip-slopping through the cowshit. This collection of witticisms on the bittersweet delights of country life will entertain and amuse, whether you're a countryside lover or reading about it in the comfort of a metropolitan retreat.