A blackly funny debut, sparkling with wit and sophistication, "Welcome to Life" is a provocative novel about family, friendship and becoming a grown-up. Adolescence is never easy. But for fourteen-year-old Freya - brought up by parents who act like teenagers, and surrounded by teenagers all too desperate be grown-ups - it's bewildering. All she wants is a bit of attention...But her parents are too wrapped up in their own dramas to register Freya's. Her mother, Millie, is inconsistent, irresponsible, and wants her daughter to be her best gal pal. Unfortunately she finds her utterly inscrutable, a disappointment and a chore, and her fondest communications reach Freya in the form of notes left on the fridge door: 'Feed rabbits'; 'Sandwich for lunch - cheese in fridge only one day out of date', and 'Be less scary'. Freya's dad, Hugh, is in the property game. 'When there's a recession on, you have to keep an eye on the figures,' he told her once. If only he'd listened to his own advice...In desperation, Freya goes looking for love in all the wrong places. And when her parents break dramatically with marital convention, they leave Freya in turmoil as she realizes that, for Millie and Hugh, three is not a crowd...